How’d you go with your homework from last week on Why Losing Weight Is An Absolute MUST For Me?
“What’s that? Your list of reasons is eight blocks long?”
Good on you, 10 outta 10 for Step 1.
Being aware of your reasons Why Weight Loss Is A Must is a vital step in your weight loss journey. The longer the list, the more leverage you have on yourself. And bay bee, leverage is a goooood thing.
Today we’re going to explore Step 2. It’s a deceptively simple step and one that is often overlooked by those who fail to lose weight.
Are you ready?
Here tis…Step 2.
Now what you need to do is the opposite of last week’s list. You need to write a list of Why Weight Loss Is Not What I Want.
Yup, you read that right.
You currently, even if you don’t know them consciously (yet), have a bunch of reasons for wanting to stay exactly as you are… ‘downsides’ to losing weight, if you will.
“Hang on Avril. With every fibre of my being I want to lose weight. It’s my one wish in the whole world. I don’t have annnnny reasons for NOT wanting to lose weight,” you insist.
Here’s the thing darling. If that was the case, you’d be your happy weight by now and you wouldn’t be sitting here reading this article on weight loss.
On some level you know it’s true. If you wanted, with every fibre of your being, to lose weight, you would have achieved the goal already. You would’ve found a way, by hook or by crook.
Which means there’s something blocking you.
I get that it sounds weird, but right now, there’s a part of you that is real keen on you staying exactly as you are. Sure this part wants change but NOT if it actually means changing anything!!!
It’s that part of you that wants to keep overeating and it’s that part of you that has no intention of ever sticking to an exercise plan, well not for more than five minutes anyway. It’s that part of you that sabotages your good intentions.
“You what?”, I hear you chorus, “do I really have different ‘parts’ living inside me?”
Well…yes, you do.
It’s completely normal. You. Are. Not. A Freak.
It’s like there’s a part of you that wants weight loss and a part of you wants everything to stay the same. Forever. And ever.
It’s what’s known as an inner conflict.
You know that feeling. Indecision, self sabotage and on-and-off-again levels of motivation. It’s like there’s a tug-of-war going on inside your body.
No wonder you feel so exhausted.
In a nutshell, there’s a part of you that is motivated to lose weight. And there’s another part, often hidden in the recesses of your mind, that is super-motivated to keep overeating because it’s afraid it’ll lose something or have to give something up… as a result of you being your happy weight.
And it’s this exact thing that blocks you from achieving your weight loss goal.
Therefore it’s vital that you discover all the possible reasons your unconscious mind might have for thinking that there are Downsides To You Being Your Happy Weight.
If you don’t take the time to find out what these reasons might be, you’ll continue to self-sabotage and weight loss will remain tantalisingly out of your reach.
So Step 2 for you right now is answering the question:
The Downside To Me Being My Happy Weight Is…
Think for a moment. Look inside.
There’s no right or wrong here, just that little voice in your heart, that voice which is your truth.
I encourage you to be curious.
Give a voice to this part of you that keeps heading for the fridge or continues to eat long after your physical hunger has been satisfied. Listen kindly and see what it has to say.
And know this too. This overeating part of you, it has a positive intention. Even if right now you don’t know what that positive intention is. Trust that it has one.
So here goes….here are some examples as a starter for 10. Feel free to read these and allow them to trigger a list of your own.
The Downside To Me Being My Happy Weight Is…
When I’m angry, depressed, anxious, bored and lonely I head for the fridge. If I didn’t use food, what would I do instead?
Currently every time my boss talks down to me or takes me for granted, I head for the chocolate in the vending machine. If I didn’t turn to chocolate what would fill the gap?
Right now, I eat to calm my inner critic. If I didn’t eat, how would I keep the volume down?
Eating helps me make up for the deprivation I experienced as a child, and it helps me forget the past.
Perhaps you eat because your intimate relationships don’t satisfy some basic need like trust or security and you use food to fill that gap.
If your appetite kicks in when you’re faced with new challenges and you use food to avoid rising to the test, and on some level you feel that it protects you from the fear of failure, then, write that down.
Allow yourself to write down whatever comes up for you. There’s no need to analyse the list, simply allow yourself the gift of curious observation.
There’s no right or wrong around any of this, OK?
Today it’s simply about getting it down on paper. It’s about information gathering. It’s about listening to that voice which is full of positive intention that up until now has been sabotaging you. Once it’s out in the open, in your awareness, it can no longer ambush you.
By becoming consciously aware of the ways in which you currently use food, ways that you would have to give up in order to be your happy weight, then you’re setting yourself up for success.
Awareness creates choice. Go create yourself some choice by writing your own list. Notice as you compile the list that the tug-of-war is already lessening its power over you, simply through having awareness of what’s going on in the recesses of your mind.
Love etc, Avril