Archives January 2017

She stared at me aghast. “You want me to what?!”

“You know it’s time. ..you’re ready to do it,” I responded.

I’d met Lisa several months ago. Since then, she’d shed 15kgs.

She’d changed some unhelpful habits with hypnosis and, step by step, she was rapidly gaining momentum.

Her home – and the mess housed within it – was her next challenge.

What’s the big deal with clutter?

We’ve all seen those hoarder-type shows on telly.

The most obvious clutter is physical, but it’s also mental and emotional. It’s any extra “stuff” that clogs up your space.

It stops the flow of energy, and can make us feel overwhelmed, stuck or constipated.

So, I encouraged Lisa to go through every item in the house and remove anything she no longer loved.

The rule is simple – if you absolutely love it, keep it. If you don’t love it, let it go.

(When you let it go to the charity shop, you’re giving someone else the chance to love it.)

Some of the excuses that came up for Lisa included:

– But I spent half my bonus on it and I might need it someday!
–  It was a gift from my favourite Gran…I’ve got to keep it, don’t I?
–  Sure, I never use it but it was such a bargain!

 The ‘Fat Me’ Clothes

Her decluttering almost de-railed when she came across her box of Fat Me Clothes.

The box was bursting with elasticised-trousers, stretchy tops and baggy jumpers that she’d taken refuge under when she was heavier.

Because she’d dropped three dress-sizes, she no longer fitted these clothes. And with her increasing confidence, her tastes were changing– she was cherishing tailored styles.

“So, Lisa,” I asked. “For what purpose would you want to keep this box?”

She was embarrassed, but honest.

“Well, if I fail to keep the weight off, I might wish I had kept these clothes.”

Long pause.

“So, you’d be overweight and p*ssed off with yourself…but at least you’ll have those ugly tracky pants?”

She laughed as the penny dropped.

By keeping her fat clothes, she was telling her unconscious mind, “I don’t really believe in my own success.”

When I next saw her, she’d made the trip to the charity shop. She was beaming.

“Saying goodbye to my fat clothes was terrifying, but liberating! It was like announcing to myself, “I AM DOING THIS – I trust myself.””

She’d never backed herself in such a solid way before.

Clearly, there’s more to weight loss than tossing old clothes.

Hoarding and chronic clutter is a symptom of something else. Deep down, we’re saying, “What if I can’t survive without it?”

It’s doubly-hard to lose weight (make money, be happy, whatever your goal is) if you’re sending those kinds of fear-based messages to your unconscious mind.

Now you, gorgeous reader.

What are you holding onto that no longer serves you? Is it time you had your own declutter session?

Where to start. Declutter…

– physical items that’ve seen better days
– presents you’ve received but don’t really like
– clean up Facebook news feeds (hide people who are constantly negative)
– give away books you started but never really got into
– Facebook groups that add nothing to your day
– volunteer positions, committees or groups you no longer want to serve
– hobbies you want to give up (no time, outgrown the group, don’t enjoy it anymore)
– specific emotions you want to give up (anger towards an ex, resentment at a friend

Go through item by item, drawer by drawer in the nooks and crannies of your house and mind. Eliminate anything that no longer sparks joy or love in you.

Now, it’s not always going to feel good to declutter. You might feel like you’re giving up something (money, being liked, memories) but you’ll gain a lightness, an energy, a wonderful freedom.

Just like Lisa did.

Pick one drawer to work on today.

Just one.

And let it go.

Uncluttered love, Avril

PS: If you’re tired of struggling with your weight or battling with physical, mental or emotional clutter, hypnotherapy may just be the answer you’re looking for. Why not c’mon over and have a chat….

A fortnight ago, a bunch of brave women – maybe even gorgeous you – resolved to make changes to their weight, shape and size.

If your commitment to your NY’s resolution is already waning, here’s ONE specific thing you can do immediately to make 2017 the year you become comfortable in your own skin.

Forget “bored to tears”

Resolve and write down your big goal. Make sure it’s something that is meaningful to you. Not your husband, your best friend, but you.

Also, make sure it inspires and excites you. It’s impossible to remain committed to a goal that bores you to tears.

For example, do you really want this year to be about “losing 20kgs?”

Wouldn’t you rather 2017 be the year you “fell deeply in love with yourself. Oh, and by the way, you shifted 20kgs in the process?”

Yes or yes?!

Next, and most importantly…

The most important step – make the daily action that leads towards your goal, absolutely tiny. Minuscule even. So small you can’t help but achieve it.

Most of the time, whatever we’re stuck on is doable if we break it onto small enough action steps.

So, instead of resolving to “lose a 50kgs by March”, decide to shift one kilo. Just-the-one-kilo.

Focus on changing one small aspect of your day that takes you in the direction of shifting that 1kg.

Maybe it’s taking a 15-minute walk after dinner 5 times a week. Perhaps it’s switching off the telly and sitting at the table when you eat so you can be more mindful of your food.

Pick one thing to focus on at a time.

Then, when you’ve shifted that kilo, celebrate! Perhaps a haircut or a massage – and resolve to shift one more kg.

After that one’s gone, get a manicure, and commit to shifting one more kilo and changing one more habit.

Before you know it, you’ve dropped a dress size and you’re positively glowing from all the celebratory self care. You’re on a roll – yahoo!

And even better than the thinner thighs, is the growing belief in yourself. You can do this. You are doing this! Easily, patiently and gracefully.

I know it’s not especially glamorous but this method gets results.

Remember, small habit-change adds up to radical change over time. It’s about taking the next small – often very imperfect – step that takes you closer to your dream.

You’re rebuilding trust in yourself.
You’re gathering momentum.
You’re setting yourself up for a fabulous 2017.

And, if you’ve already fallen off the wagon, don’t be too hard on yourself.

Every day is a new opportunity to start fresh.
Every day.
Like today.

And keep on, keeping on.

Love etc, Avril

PS: How are you progressing with your NY’s resolution? Lasting change can be challenging – I get that. If you’re struggling with commitment, perhaps hypnotherapy is the way forward for you. Why not c’mon over and have a chat….