Archives 2014

We’ve all been there.

You’re at the cinema enjoying a night out with the girls. You order one of those enormous packets of popcorn. Perhaps you tell yourself “I’ll only eat half”. Imagine the surprise, when after a short time, your hand scrapes the bottom of the box already. Where’d all that popcorn go?!

That – dear reader – is a classic case of mindless eating. So mesmerised were we by the big screen, that we didn’t even notice how much we ate.

The problem with mindless eating is that it’s breathtakingly easy for us to eat waaaaay more than our body actually needs.

And worst of all, we don’t even know we’re doing it….until bit by bit we need to up-size our jeans.

Busy, busy, busy!!!

“I’m busy!” is the most common answer to the question “so, how are you?”

In response to our busy lives we multi-task, tick off our endless To Do list and juggle competing  priorities.

Among this busyness we’ve become mesmerised.

Mesmerised by the noise around us, so that we no longer hear what’s going on within us.

INTERESTING FACT: Did you know that one of the forefathers of hypnotherapy was a German chap called Mesmer. Yep! We literally get ‘mesmerised’ by the noise and distractions around us – and we’re completely unaware of the hypnotic trance we’re in.

e.g.

One client was a self-confessed bookworm. Every evening, to reward herself after a stressful day at the office, she’d enjoy a novel while nibbling on chocolates. She’d be so engrossed in the story she’d not even taste the flavour of the delicious morsels.

Another client would routinely eat a big dinner in front of the evening news. By the end of the news he’d have finished his generous portion, but because he’d been so distracted by the headlines, he’d take little notice of his dinner. Within 30 minutes he’d be heading to the pantry driven by the feeling “I just need a little something more”.

Another client would buy takeaways at the Drive Through and eat it while she was navigating traffic. Then, once home, she’d eat dinner. It was like her burger en route didn’t register in her tummy because she was distracted with driving.

So….what is mindful eating?

Mindful eating is about engaging ALL of your senses when you eat.

Really taste the sweetness of your chocolate.
See the colours of summer in that salad.
Feel the delicate texture of the steak on your tongue.
Inhale the savoury scent of garlic.
Say a silent blessing to the farmer who raised the chicken you’re about to enjoy.
Be still and focus on the food in front of you.

Simple steps to being mindful

The easiest way to be mindful is to close your book, turn off the telly, power down your iPad. You can always update your Facebook page and answer those emails after you’ve eaten!

If you’re at the Drive Through, do not eat while driving. Instead find a quiet spot where you can give your burger the attention that it needs, and you can hear your the signals from your body.

Be present.
Be grateful.
Be mindful.

Food was meant to be enjoyed, to be savoured. Eating is not just another thing to tick off your To Do list!

So why not take the time to honour and nourish your body. Slow your eating down (see Step 1) and be mindful.

When you’re truly mindful, you’ll be able to hear your miraculous body giving you significant cues as to when to eat – but more importantly – when to stop eating.

Love etc, Avril

PS: We get what we want in life by taking small, regular steps in the right direction. If you’re finding even these simple steps difficult to action, hypnotherapy can help you do what you need to do.

I received an email recently. You know the kind. The kind that makes you break out your happy dance and go all “whoop whoop” .

It read: “We’ve never met, but I wanted to let you know how much you’ve impacted my weight, my wardrobe and health.”

“Over the last three months I’ve dropped 12kgs – that’s three dress sizes – all without counting calories. Guess how? All I did was follow your list of 8 success principles which I found pinned to the fridge (my housemate is a hypnotherapy client of yours).

Bright idea

But her email gave me an idea. You see, I love impacting lives of women I’ve never met. I’m all for helping women get confidence and control around food. I’m a big believer in the power of women to influence the well-being of the house. We all know that when we women are happy, then the whole house is happy.

So I’ve decided to share with you the success principles that I teach clients, so that you – dear reader – can apply these simple habits in the comfort of your home.

How’s that sound?!

Just so you know, I’m intentionally going to tackle only one habit per week so it’s nice n simple. Do not be fooled. If that voice in your head says “this is too simple to make any difference”, ignore it.

You see, small daily habit change adds up to radical change over time. Radical change re that number on the scale. Radical change in your confidence. Radical change in being comfortable in your own skin.

HEADSUP: Although awareness is the essential first step in creating change in your weight, unfortunately reading about the habits isn’t enough for you to lose weight – you actually have to ‘do’ them!

So, here is this week’s habit change….

Step 1: Eat slowly

Yep, I know what you’re thinking. Que???! That’s ri-donk-ulously simple. Yep. It’s very simple, low tech, even.

So simple that it’s easy to dismiss the idea, thinking “how can something that simple help me lose weight?”

But here’s why it’s important.

You see we all have an enzyme in our stomach that tells our brain when we’re full. It’s the “I’m done now, so stop eating” signal.

But this is enzyme is a slowcoach. It takes about 15 minutes for it to travel from our gut to our brain.

Which means if we’re shovelling in our Sunday roast or scoffing the hors d’oeuves at a party, it’s easy, oh so easy, to go from utterly famished to absolutely stuffed. Our poor brain doesn’t even have a chance to register the “I’m done” signal.

This means if you’re a quick eater, it’s very easy to overeat, which can add up to a lot of extra calories, over time.

So, sloooooooooooooooow it down. The easiest way to slow down your eating is to put your knife and fork down between mouthfuls.  It sounds silly, but it’s a great strategy.

Eating: cake? Put that slice of deliciousness back on the plate between mouthfuls, and chew. Fried chicken? Lay the drumstick down on your napkin between mouthfuls. Chips? Take one and a time and really enjoy the flavour.

By slowing down you receive the “I’m done” signal from your tummy, which means you’ll be less inclined to overeat and you’ll be satisfied with smaller portions.

You’ll also have the opportunity to have some conversations and engage with other around the table. How civilised!

Permission granted to ‘mess it up’

We’re all human and we all stumble when we learn something new.

So, when you find yourself half way through hoovering your pasta and you remember, “Ooops, that Avril-hypno-chica said I’m supposed to put my knife and fork down between mouthfuls!” – simply start where you are, even if it’s mid-chew.

That’s it: no drama, no beating yourself up, no – “OMG, I fail at everything!!” – just “remember to remember” and put your utensils down.

Confession time….

Do I eat slowly at every meal? Heck no! For example, if I have five minutes for lunch between clients, then I’m going to eat pretty darn quickly. But it’s what we do MOST of the time that matters.

So, starting from your next mouthful, simply remember to slow down your eating and allow that wonderful ‘slowcoach’ enzyme to register “enough now, I’m done.”

Yes, this is a tiny shift, miniscule even – but these changes add up to radical change over time.

Tune in next week for Step 2.

Love etc, Avril

PS: Losing weight isn’t about one silver bullet or magic pill – it happens through small, daily habit change. If you’re struggling to change what you know needs changing, hypnotherapy can help. Why not drop me a line over here…

“How is it that I can be super successful in my career, in total control of every area of my life, but I struggle when it comes to my weight?”

It’s a very, very common frustration.

Most clients I work with are stereotypical high flyers. Think résumés jam-packed with goals set,  achieved, celebrated.

For many of these women, their weight is the “last piece of the frustrating puzzle”, so to speak.

So why doesn’t a weight loss goal work the same way, as say, a professional or sporting goal?

There are a couple of key differences.

And just so we’re absolutely clear – when I talk about weight loss, I’m not talking about losing a kilos, achieving your goal weight then re-gaining it all back again. I’m talking about long term – “forever” – weight loss, the kind where you never need go on another diet again.

In most cases, harder + faster = quicker

With most goals, when you work harder, faster, and are more focused – you typically get swifter rewards.

But ‘forever’ weight loss doesn’t work like that.

It’s like when you hang your Christmas lights in December, and you find them in the box all tangled up.

The harder you pull at the knotted mess, the faster you try and untangle them, the tighter the knot gets. Grrrrrr!

Weight loss can be a bit like Christmas lights.

Here’s why.

The 2 ‘logical’ misconceptions

The Law of Deprivation: Often with weight loss, our logic is “if cutting back a little helps me lose a little bit of weight, then cutting back a lot will really speed things up, right?”

Logical in theory – yes. But does it work? Nope.

The very act of deprivation sends your incredibly clever body into the starvation response, which makes it even harder to shift the weight.

And, the more you deprive yourself, the more unpleasant the journey becomes, so you’re unlikely to stay the distance. And, depriving ourselves adds fuel to your night time cravings.

For example, you’re restricting yourself during the day because you’re “being good”. But hour after hour the pressure builds, until the evening, when you “can’t handle it any more”, you crack and give in to your cravings.

True or true?!

Law of the Deadline: It’s common in traditional goal setting to give goals a deadline. I often have clients who’ve previously given themselves deadlines, like “four weeks to lose 12kgs before my cruise”. They thought that the urgency would spur them into action. But did it?

Again, nope. Every day that ticks by – with the target looming closer – they start to freak that they “haven’t made enough progress”, which leads to them quitting in exasperation.

So, what’s the answer?

Patience, grasshopper.

As much as I’d love to give you a magic pill or a secret code…..the answer is patience and persistence. It’s about changing your daily habits and creating a lifestyle that supports your wellbeing in the long term.

Let’s go back to the tangled Christmas lights. Instead of rushing, yanking, pushing and pulling, it’s important to take the opposite approach.

Slow down.
Be patient.
Gradually unravel the wires.

This is not a race.
Take your time.
Be the turtle.

This isn’t about achieving a goal then piling it all back on again. It’s about becoming the kind of person who manages their weight naturally.

The 5 things you might want to do:

1. Abandon deadlines and aim for steady progress. Progress wins over perfection every day of the week. Forget about “starting on Monday“.

2. Make small changes to your eating and exercise that you know you can and want to live with for the rest of your life.

3. Be flexible. If something doesn’t work – oh, well. Learn from your mistakes.

4. Be patient. It might take longer than you thought, but it will be worth it.

5. Keep on keeping on. When you stumble (becuase trust me you will – its’ ALL part of the process!) pick yourself up, put on your big girl knickers and keep on keeping on. No. Matter. What.

The paradox of long term weight loss is that going faster and pushing harder simply does NOT work. As difficult as it may be for the success-oriented high achiever in you, the answer is to go gently.

Love etc, Avril

PS: Ms High Achiever, if you’re sitting there reading this thinking, “I knooooooooooow all of this, I just don’tdo it!”, feel free to drop me a line. Hypnosis can help you do the doing that you know you need to do to lose weight.

Are you an “extraordinarily disciplined individual”?

If not, chances are you eat more than you think.

Or, so says Dr Brian Wansink of Cornell University.

In his fascinating book Mindless Eating, Wansink research shows how normal weight people underestimate their food intake by about 20 per cent.

But get this – people who are overweight – underestimate the amount they eat by more than 50 per cent.

Yup, read that correctly – 50 per cent!

It seems that many of us are accidentally supersizing ourselves, without even realising.

Rather appropriately, he describes the gap between what you think you eat and what you actually eat as the “mindless margin”.

Portion creep

“Portion creep” is a huge trap. It’s the relentless upsizing of portions which has occurred over the last several decades.

For example, you might tell yourself, “Oh, I only had a muffin for lunch” or “I only had a bowl of cereal for breakfast”.

But research shows there’s a huge variation in what a ‘portion’ is these days.

These days, one muffin can feed a small nation and pack in nearly as many calories as an entire meal did in our parent’s generation.

A bowl of cereal could contain anything from the standard half-cup to two cups, depending on the size of your bowl and your appetite.

But in our minds, it’s still just one serve. Our brains focus on the number of serves – not the amount – which is where we lead ourselves up the weight-gain-garden-path.

You can see how fast food outlets have rather cleverly taken advantage of this.

In the 1970s, McDonald’s had one size of fries – what’s now known as “small”. The rationale was that if people wanted more, they could always order a second portion. But people didn’t because they felt greedy asking for two portions.

However, when the McDonalds marketing team introduced the bigger portion of fries, it suddenly became psychologically easier for us to order and eat way more.

Portion creep has become very popular. You don’t need to look far to see that enormous portions are now the new ‘normal’ – from cafes to pubs to our homes.

So what can we do?

The good news is we can resist the portion creep with a little bit of awareness.

A little bit of mindfulness goes a long way…

1. Use a smaller bowl or plate. You’ll eat less, without feeling deprived, because you will still have a “full” plate.

2. Cut muffins, slices and cakes in half, and share the ‘em, or leave what you don’t want on the plate.

3. Also, don’t be fooled by “value” deals. Only buy what you really want to eat. While you might feel that you need a huge portion to get good value – it’s erroneous. Value deals and upsizing have an enormous cost – it’s just that we just pay with our bodies and health, instead of our wallets.

So why not start listening to your own body and use these tips to become more mindful aware of how you might be accidentally super sizing yourself?

Love etc, Avril

PS: If you’ve forgotten what that “full” feeling feels like, hypnotherapy can help. Why not give me a call, c’mon over….

Sounds crazy, but we all have a voice in our head.

“What the………??? I do………………???”

Yup. That voice!

If you’re like most women, we can be our own worst enemy when it comes to losing weight – all because of the nasty things we barrage ourselves with every day.

Recently, a client shared how her voice started criticising her from the moment her feet touched the floor in the morning.

It had all sorts of accusations.

“Geez, you lazy cow, you slept terribly, now you’re really behind the eight-ball, you’re so blinking unorganised, you’re just a fat, disorganised disgrace, you’re terrible mum and one day the how world will know…..”

On and on it went.

Ouch.

How exhausting.

Food as self-medication

Unsurprisingly, the only time she found peace and quiet from that voice was when she was
1. asleep
2. eating
3. after her third glass of wine.

With that barrage of self-loathing – in her own head – is it any wonder she regularly self-medicated with ‘comfort food’ to anaesthetise herself from that mean inner voice?!

And she’s not alone.

Many clients come to me with a fierce battle of mean thoughts, self-loathing words, and emotional stuff from their past which keeps them stuck in the cycle of self-sabotage.

Well-intentioned negative talk

Turning your self-talk around is absolutely essential if you want to shift the extra weight and have a more joyful existence.

How on earth can you become the shape and size you want to be, when part of you is working against you? You can’t.

Perversely, this negative self-talk is well intentioned. We think that if “I berate myself enough, I can ‘force’ myself to shift this weight”.

But it’s impossible to hate yourself slim. How can you become the shape and size you want to be if your internal world is angry and self-destructive?

We’ve already seen how thoughts, although calorie-less, have the power to make us fat here and here.

Shifting negative and nagging self-talk to a more positive chatter, is an absolute must. Here’s a step by step plan of what to do when your inner critic gets on her soap box.

Love etc, Avril

PS: The bottom line is this…If you’re unhappy with your weight – and you’re not getting the results you seek – there’s a good chance your self-talk is sabotaging you. If you’re ready for some kinder self-talk, why not c’mon over and have a chat…..